Cloudy

So do not fear, for I am with you;
Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you, surely I will help you;
Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.
-Isaiah 41:10


Why is it that when a cloud of uncertainty passes over us, it attaches to our heart and will not move out of the way for the clarity striving to be revealed?

It lingers, mockingly, enjoying our discomfort at trying to decipher its appearance. It laughs when we shield ourselves from its onslaught but cannot fully block its advances. And the more we attempt to untangle ourselves from its spidery arms, the more we become ensnared. It is relentless and spins our heads into such disarray we wonder for days after what came out of the storm we feebly tried to weather.

We think a thousand thoughts at the reasons we are tested, and the closer we try to get to the big picture, the less we truly see and understand. It’s like our life is one big maze, and we are the guinea pig curving around corners in search of blue skies and fresh air that will greet us as we finally make our way to the exit. In all the searching, never once did we expect to encounter a row of dead ends.

Somewhere there is an answer. Somewhere, sunshine and smiles. And somewhere, Someone is holding all we want to know. Is holding all we’ll ever need.

We may never find the exact clarity we’re looking for. We may never fully understand why we went through all we did. And that’s ok. Because we don’t need to know. At this point in life, we just need to acknowledge that the confusion will pass, there will be adventures at the next turn, and we are closer to our prize and comfort than we may imagine. And when the haze is lifted, we will realize that we were never once left alone in the abyss.


Prayer:
Father, I thank You that through all my uncertainty, all my questions and confusion, that You have been with me, right by my side. You know how my head and heart spin, yet You steady them with Your soothing hand. Please continue to hold me close, and walk with me as I try to navigate this cloudy maze, because I absolutely cannot even try to go at it without You. Amen.